Fist-Bumping Babies

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After parenting for over a decade, it is down right crazy how trends change. With my first baby, we bought our first digital camera. We thought we were so cool. Now, you are not really cool unless you have a DSLR… or something like that. Or else, our smartphones take quick shots for us. Funny thing is, my phone’s camera is waaaay better than my first digital camera ever was.

With my first baby, we were careful to follow every single unnecessary thing the experts said. By baby five, I have learned that a changing table just takes up space and shoes are just not worth it until they start walking.

No more normal strollers… we all have joggers. (I love mine by the way!!) Plastic is now the devil. Make your own food is in, and please, only muslin will do for my baby. (Just kidding. I buy soft material to make blankets and never get around to it. So they just get used as blankets with no hemming. Deconstructed blankets. Trend officially started.)

It’s funny how times have changed.

But the most profound difference to me is in what my baby learns. Granted, she has so so many “teachers” that love nothing more than to show her the ropes of life. When my first was born, my little brother would work on “high fives” with her. Now, my own kids teach their baby sister the “fist bump.”

I like the fist bump for many reasons. First, it’s hygenic. Much better than a full on hand of mud or boogers or gummed up graham crackers. I’m sure that many viruses have not been spread by implementing the fist bump.

I also like it for the lack of pain involved. Kids learn fast how to smack that hand hard. And theirs are so chubby it doesn’t phase them. As for me, my hands are the trimmest part of by body. Real bummer.

Then there’s the appearance. A baby looks so chill holding out their fist waiting for the bump. It’s like “Power to the People” in an adorable, non-menacing way.

As of church nursery yesterday, my Evie and her friend Elijah have started fist bumping each other. It is adorable watching two one-and-a-half year olds try to knock knuckles. I know it will invariably turn into punching, but we will cross that road when we get there. At least right now, they look chill.

I wonder what another decade will hold. Perhaps Evelyn will be teaching her nieces and nephews the “high one”. Or maybe they will just give a gangsta nod by that point. We may not really make any human contact at all by that time, with how addicted we all are to our screens. Anything is possible.


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